Dirty Brit: Love Without Limits Read online

  But the way her gaze looks at anything but me, I have a sinking feeling she’s ready to give me her notice. Not that I’d blame her after the way I acted.

  “Are you going to have breakfast with us, Daddy?”

  “Actually, I was thinking...” I smile down at my daughter. “Today is such a beautiful day, it would be a waste to miss it. I think we should all go to the lake.”

  “Really?” Amelia’s eyes widen, and she wraps her arms around my neck and squeezes so hard that I cough. “Oh, thank you, Daddy.” She squirms out of my arms. “I’m going to go get my swimsuit on.”

  She’s racing away before I can stop her.

  I shouldn’t be taking the time off, not with work piling up, but I know this is something I need to do, especially when Dina pushes her chair back, and says, “I need to speak to you.”

  I walk toward her, stopping close enough that I can inhale her intoxicating scent. “I hope you’re not thinking about leaving.”

  She glances up at me then. “I thought you’d think it was for the best. I mean...” She swallows. “After what happened...”

  I brush my thumb across her bottom lip, wanting to do so much more, and I feel her tremble under my touch. “I don’t want you to leave.”

  “But...”

  “I won’t stop you if that’s really what you want.” I lean closer, needing her lips on mine. “Yes, this connection between us complicates things. And if it means me stepping back in order for you to stay, I will. Just tell me what you want.”

  “I told you what I wanted last night.” There’s a flash of frustration in her eyes.

  “Is it still what you want?”

  She tilts her chin up and holds my gaze. “I don’t know. I just...” She closes her eyes and lets out a frustrated breath. “I do things that are impulsive. And maybe that’s all it was last night. An impulse. I’ve saved myself for...for...”

  “For what?”

  “For the right person. The one. And then I’m throwing myself at a complete stranger, because he’s got nice abs, and...” She covers her face and groans.

  I pull her hands away from her face. “You’re right, I am a stranger. But I want to get to know you.”

  She sighs, “Why?”

  “I can’t explain it, but I like the way I feel when I’m around you. And I’ll do anything to see those dimples again.”

  She smiles, and they appear.

  “There. Now the sun is really out.” I’m about to kiss her when Amelia races back into the room, wearing a bright yellow bathing suit and carrying her shovel and pail set.

  “I’m ready to go.”

  I chuckle, and say to Dina, “I hope you packed a bathing suit.”

  * * *

  “It’s not as tall as Big Ben,” I say, standing back to admire our sand castle handiwork. “But that is one impressive sand castle.”

  “Can we get ice cream now?” Amelia asks, tugging on my hand.

  I look over at Dina. She looks so gorgeous in her one piece, it has a high enough cut, and low enough front to keep my cock happy, but it’s tasteful all the same. “Would you like any?”

  She is about to answer when Amelia cuts her off. “No, Daddy. Just us.”

  “Sweetheart, of course we can get Dina a waffle cone. It’s blazing out and who doesn’t like a treat on a beach day?”

  She crosses her arms. “I don’t.”

  “What do you mean you don’t?” I ask, frustrated by my child’s demands.

  “I mean I don’t want any if she is having some too.”

  My eyebrows raise and Dina looks stunned. To be honest, a flash of embarrassment rushes over me. I want Dina to see me as a capable man and father, not cow-towing to a six-year-old.

  “You know,” Dina says, her smile not faltering. She pulls on a cover up and reaches for her tote bag and towel. “I’m going to let you two have some family time. I’ll be around the bend if you need me.”

  She doesn’t ask if that's alright, she doesn’t stand by and watch me fail - she just removes herself from the situation. It’s fucking hot, honestly.

  I need to take control in the same way. I may be fantastic in the boardroom, but if I’m not careful my most important client - my dear Amelia - is going to suffer.

  “Amelia,” I say, leading her back to our beach chairs. “We aren’t going to get a treat, after all.”

  She frowns. “Why not, Daddy? The nanny is gone.”

  “The nanny has a name. And I don’t like the way you treated her. After all, you were so happy with her yesterday, what changed?”

  “I don’t want to share you, Daddy. Ever.”

  I chuckle, tousling my little one’s hair, remembering her as a baby, her colic - she always did have a strong personality. “I’m sorry that upsets you, but Dina is here all summer and I’m going to be her friend. She’s very nice, and I know you can get along.”

  Amelia’s eyes fill with tears. “Oh Daddy,” she cries, wrapping her arms around my leg. “It’s not fair.”

  “What’s not fair? Not getting ice cream?”

  She wipes her cheeks, sniffling. “No. It’s not fair that some little girls get mummies and all I get is a nanny.”

  That makes my chest tighten in ways it rarely does. I pick up my little girl and carry her back to our spot. I won’t cave and give her ice cream, but I can certainly make her feel better with a hug.

  Chapter Six

  Dina

  After the beach day, I start reading articles about parenting. Yes, I realize I’m not a parent, but nannying for a six-year-old little girl I’ve just met is very different than watching over my cousins I’ve known since birth. Amelia has different needs, and it's obvious she craves attention from her father. But he can’t be with her day and night, and it isn’t fair to request it of him.

  No, she just needs some tender loving care. With boundaries.

  And I admit, focusing on her is the perfect distraction.

  Because every day Callum comes home from work, it’s so hard to concentrate on anything besides the way his suit fits so snugly around his shoulders.

  He is getting more attractive each passing day and it’s making my sleep an absolute disaster. I toss and turn each night, only finding relief when I touch myself, desperate to come the way he made me.

  It never happens. His touch was different, the flick of his tongue deeper, more penetrating. Perfect.

  Each morning I try to erase the memories of the night before - where I relived those precious minutes I spent under Callum’s hand. And instead, I focus on Amelia. On planning days full of fun, interesting plans that will keep her curiosity piqued.

  This morning, we are finishing breakfast of sausage and eggs when I tell her our plans for the day.

  “So after we clean up, we’ll head to the grocery store and gather all the ingredients for dinner and for dessert!”

  She twists her lips. “Can I help make it?”

  I smile, looking over at Callum who is stacking his morning paper, preparing to leave for the day. “Of course, Amelia. You're going to be my sous chef.”

  “Sue-what?”

  “My helper. My sidekick. My partner in crime.”

  This has her giggling and Callum stands, kissing his daughter on the head. “Will you be home for supper, Daddy?” she asks.

  He taps his chin, taking on a mock-serious tone. “Depends. What’s on the menu at Chez Wharton this evening?”

  Amelia giggles, looking over at me. “What is it? What will we make?”

  “I was thinking my famous Cozido a Portuguesa.”

  “And what is that?” Callum asks.

  “I’ll guess you’ll have to wait and see,” I say, lifting my eyebrows. “But dessert will be my signature chocolate cake.”

  Amelia claps her hands. “Can we go shopping now?” she asks.

  I laugh. “In a second, why don’t you go wash up from breakfast first?”

  She scurries off and Callum and I stand, his briefcase is in hand, and I see
him hesitate to leave. We haven’t touched since the day I arrived. And after Amelia’s melt-down at the beach, I know why. He’s torn.

  So am I.

  And yet for a split second, we stand there as if we could so easily lean in and kiss like a married couple before we part ways for the day. For a moment, I think we might. We both lean in with such longing, with such desire, that I feel the heat pass between us. The want growing.

  Then he does. He pulls me close, kissing me so softly, it’s nearly chaste - but we both know it isn’t. When we sit here, sharing a meal with Amelia between us, it doesn’t feel like I’m doing a job I’m being paid for. It feels like home.

  The kiss deepens as the realization sinks in. I’m falling for this man even though he is so wrong, so off limits - and yet so utterly right.

  But then Amelia rushes back in. “All ready!” She stops, frowning when she looks at us.

  Callum and I both back away, me covering my mouth.

  Shit.

  “What are you doing?” she asks, her voice haughty, high. Practically a shriek. “Why did you kiss her?”

  Callum’s eyes meet mine, and I press my fingertips to my lips. “Amelia,” he starts, but she isn’t having it. She runs off to her bedroom and I look at the man who I see a future with.

  “Go,” I tell him. “Let me talk to her.”

  He wraps his arms around me and kisses my cheek. “Thank you, Dina.”

  I breathe him in before letting him go. God, he smells so damn good.

  “Don’t forget, Amelia and I are making you dinner tonight.”

  “Is that still happening?” he asks, lifting his chin toward the second floor of his home.

  I smack his butt as he walks to the front door. “I’m a Portuguese cook, Mr. Wharton. I won’t let anything get between me and dinner plans.”

  Chapter Seven

  Callum

  I spent the entire day worrying about Amelia seeing me kiss Dina, afraid she’d pull one of her stunts. Worried about so many things. Each passing day that Dina is here, I know it’s going to be harder to say goodbye.

  And the kiss this morning, it was a reminder of how much more I want from her, how much I crave her. My self-control is unraveling, and yet I know I can’t let myself give in to the temptation. It’ll only complicate an already complicated situation.

  But when I walk into the house, a delicious aroma overwhelms me, replacing my concerns with hunger. The stew Dina and Amelia made fills the house with the scent of cinnamon and roasted meat and vegetables. I loosen my tie as I enter the kitchen. Amelia’s standing on a stool, wearing an apron, stirring the pot on the stove.

  Dina sees me and a flicker passes between us. How is it possible to fall so hard, so fast?

  But despite my ravenous appetite for her, I’m not sure she is the flavor this Englishman needs.

  She’s twenty-two, carefree and has her entire life ahead of her. And me? I’m a thirty-one-year-old earl with a daughter. My life is as firmly planted as it can get.

  And yet, the moment she flashes those dimples at me, I feel all my reservations melt away.

  “Look at this,” I say, coming up behind Amelia and tickling her.

  She doesn’t find it funny. “Careful, Daddy! I don’t want to mess up the Cozido!”

  Dina laughs, taking the spoon from my daughter. “Tell your father hello, properly, Lia.”

  I lift my eyebrows. “I like that nickname.”

  Amelia spins around on the stool and lets me pick her up. “Me too.”

  “You two have a good day?” I ask trying to assess the situation. I left Dina this morning with an angry Amelia. What kind of magic did she spin on my daughter to make her so happy now?

  “We had a good day,” Amelia says slowly. “But I need to talk to you.”

  I frown. “Everything alright?”

  She looks into my eyes solemnly. “Later Daddy. We need to eat dinner now.”

  Setting the table, Dina sashays around the kitchen, placing bowls and directing Amelia to get us glasses of water, spoons, napkins.

  “We told Barb to go home,” Amelia explains, referring to our cook.

  I smile, sitting down with two of the prettiest girls I’ve ever known. I wish I could say that out loud without upsetting Amelia.

  “This looks fantastic,” I say, admiring the meal.

  “Vamos comer,” Dina says, lifting her spoon.

  “What does that mean?” Amelia asks with wonder, seemingly smitten once again with the sexiest nanny I’ve ever set eyes on.

  Dina smiles. “Let’s eat!”

  * * *

  “One more story, Daddy, please,” Amelia says when I close the book I’d just been reading from.

  “It’s late, and you and Dina have another big day planned tomorrow.”

  “We’re going to the zoo.” Her face brightens up as she remembers. “We’re going to see lions, and giraffes, and monkeys.”

  “And this little monkey needs to be getting to sleep,” Dina says from the door, walking toward the bed.

  “I’m trying,” I say chuckling.

  “Do you think there’ll be hippot-hip-hiptopomatmisses?”

  Dina smiles as she lays Amelia back and tucks her in. “Hippopotamus. I hope so. But we’ll have to wait until tomorrow to see. Give your daddy a kiss and say goodnight.”

  I lean over and kiss Amelia on the cheek. “Goodnight, sweetheart.”

  “Night, Daddy.” Then she reaches for Dina, who smiles and leans over and hugs her.

  “Sweet dreams, Lia.”

  We’re at the door when Amelia says, “Daddy?”

  “Yes?”

  “Can Dina live with us forever? I promise I’ll be good.”

  I hear Dina’s small intake of breath, and when I catch her gaze, I see the flicker of apprehension there.

  The contract she signed with the agency was only for three months, and while I may be able to convince her to stay with us for longer, I know this nanny position isn’t Dina’s dream job.

  “I’ll...” Dina fidgets, and I see the way her eyes water, but I can’t read her thoughts. “I’ll let you talk to her.”

  I sigh and nod.

  It’s going to break Amelia’s heart when she eventually leaves - mine too. But I don’t see any other outcome.

  I move back to the bed and sit on the edge. “Sweetheart, you know that Dina is only here temporarily.”

  “But I want her to stay.”

  “I know.”

  “Don’t you want her to stay?” she asks, frowning.

  “I do.” More than I’ve even admitted to myself.

  “You kissed her. That’s what Mommies and Daddies do—”

  “Amelia.”

  “Why can’t Dina be my mommy? I promise I’ll behave. I won’t run away again, and I’ll put all my toys away without you asking—”

  “Sweetheart. You know your mommy didn’t go away because of you, right?”

  “Maybe if I’d been better, the angels wouldn’t have taken her away. Maybe...maybe she would have wanted to stay.”

  My throat constricts making it impossible to swallow. “Oh, sweet pea, your mommy loved you so much, and she wanted to stay. But she was too sick. I don’t know why she got sick, but I do know that there was nothing and no one in the whole world that she loved more than you.”

  Amelia lets out a quivering sigh. “Do you think she can see me from heaven?”

  “I don’t know,” I say honestly. “But if she can, I know she’d be so proud of the clever, beautiful little girl you’ve become.”

  My daughter’s eyes widen on a thought. “Maybe Mommy sent Dina to us. Do you think she did, Daddy?”

  “Maybe.” I brush the soft blonde wisps of hair away from her cheek. I’ve never been a religious man, but since Dina has come into our lives, I’ve never felt more directed by fate. Maybe there’s something to my little girl’s words.

  “I love you, Daddy,” she says.

  “I love you, too.”

&nbs
p; A heavy weight rests on my shoulders when I leave her room and walk down to the parlor. I pour myself three fingers of scotch and stand in front of the large bay window, lost in my thoughts.

  “Is everything okay?” Dina asks softly when she enters.

  I turn, meeting her worried gaze. God, the woman has unraveled me in ways I didn’t know were possible.

  “She’s gotten attached to you,” I tell her, taking a sip of my drink. “So have I.”

  “Callum—”

  “There’s a gala Friday night that I have to go to,” I say, interrupting her before she can say anything I don’t want to hear. “Will you go with me?”

  She chews on her bottom lip, frowning. “I don’t have anything fancy to wear.”

  “I can take care of that.” Setting my drink down, I move toward her, wondering why the hell I’ve put distance between us.

  Because she’s going to leave. Because I didn’t want to confuse Amelia. Because ultimately, I don’t want my heart to break again.

  I’ve wasted my time with her. And I don’t want to keep making that mistake.

  I place a hand on the back of her neck, one on her lower back and draw her closer, breathing her in. “Come with me.”

  “As your...your date?” Those dark, expressive eyes search mine.

  “Yes. Dina Pacheco, I’m asking you to be my date.”

  Chapter Eight

  Dina

  When the boxes arrive at the house, I assume they are packages for Callum, but then I notice they are addressed to me. Walking into the kitchen, Amelia asks what it is, her curiosity piqued, same as mine.

  “I’m not sure, want to help me open it?”

  She nods and I ease the wrapping tape off the corners of the larger box and Amelia lifts the lid, then peels back the delicate tissue paper.

  “Oh!” she exclaims. “A princess gown!”

  She isn’t exaggerating. I lift the dress from the box, the glittering jewels covering the bodice, the dark red satin luxurious in my hand. I realize the label is designer and when I hold the dress up to myself, I can’t help but smile. It’s one-shouldered, with a fishtail, and the intricate beading makes it sparkle head to toe.